how is it so easy for you
to be kind she said
i looked at her
into the starry nights
across the green plains
and stepped onto the battle field
i wanted to be tough
but people weren't kind to me i whispered
falling back onto the
endless hole of broken dreams
floating in the air
then sinking into the deep blue of their weapons
their thoughts
----the teacher
she would push up her glasses
smiling with her teeth exposed
placing her hands onto the computer
---who knows what she is after?
look what you made
leaving me in notoriety with your nasty little
minds she would shout at us
our world was pure back then
full of magic and sparkles but she
brushed them off the table like crumbs of leftovers
---worthless
the term "next door" used to be such a familiar
yet distant phrase
her mouth filled with sweet honey
but her head filled with creatures eating out all the beautiful
childhood memories she had
she must have thought she
had added sweeteners
into our lives
she never knew how
i looked at her like a beast trapped in
a tiny body with a mission---perhaps
to turn the sugar
into salt
the purity into tainted hearts
which once learned how to love
and visualize
but forgotten by the cruelty of the world
---graduation
the red numbers
on those meaningless papers cannot be worth more than
an opportunity
a lifetime to achieve
comparison surrounded me
words are the weapons she used to
strike us down
did you think i was a bottle where you can just fill into
am i a weekend getaway wild enough for you to have lost your mind
am i a piece of candy you tore open and empty
i know i kept it all to myself
how you screamed at us for doing the
bare minimum
the way you said i had
no potential of being anyone great
---underestimation
i saw mom storming out the room
the other day after a
conference
she turned to say hi
i stood frozen with all my classmates surrounding
me
i think you never saw
the tears streaming down her face
when you still joke about me
glancing at the victim you've
managed to kill
the trees swaying in the autumn breeze
i loved the light blue skies
the clouds rising up and down
just like how you gracefully
danced your way in front of my face
telling everyone that
i painted my family tree
blue
because i am just a
little bundle of gloom
but no little girl would
possibly have that strong sense of melancholy
---the blue painting
i fear when you speak of
elementary school
i'm afraid it is her again.